By Costin Liculescu, creator of InsightArea
Imagine that you are a software developer starting your working day. A new task is waiting for you: “Improve the onboarding experience.” The request sounds important, but it leaves several questions unanswered. Which part of onboarding is failing? What would count as an improvement? Who can decide between competing approaches? You open the codebase, inspect a few files, search for possible solutions, and then find yourself checking an unrelated message. An hour has passed, and the task is still almost exactly where it was.
The assignment is genuinely unclear, so information and problem-solving are needed. At the same time, the developer may be making that uncertainty harder to tolerate by silently insisting, “I should already know what to do. I cannot begin until I have a clear plan.” The practical solution must address both the real obstacle and the way the person is interpreting it.
When uncertainty becomes a reason to postpone
People often assume they need to feel ready before they can make meaningful progress. A difficult task violates that expectation because it can expose gaps in knowledge, demand concentration, or force us to ask questions whose answers are not immediately available. Avoiding the task briefly removes those unpleasant experiences. Checking email, reorganizing notes, or reading one more article offers an immediate sense of relief, even though the original problem remains unsolved.
This does not make research or preparation useless. Some tasks really do require additional information before a responsible decision is possible. The important distinction is whether the activity reduces a relevant uncertainty or merely helps us avoid the experience of being uncertain. Reading an architectural document to identify a constraint is useful. Reading unrelated material because we dislike not knowing the answer may be a sophisticated form of postponement.
The belief hidden behind “I don’t know where to start”
One of the central ideas in my book, How to Do Hard Things: The Discomfort Trap, is the difference between a flexible preference and a rigid demand. The developer can reasonably prefer a complete specification, enough time, and immediate clarity. The difficulty grows when that preference becomes an absolute condition: “I must know exactly how to solve this before I can do anything useful.”
A more realistic response would be: “I would strongly prefer a clearer task and a better starting point, but I do not absolutely need to know the entire solution before taking a useful step. Some uncertainty is uncomfortable, and I can tolerate it while I clarify the problem.” This way of thinking does not create missing requirements, make a risky technical decision safe, or guarantee success. It allows the person to stop treating discomfort itself as proof that progress is impossible.
Rational self-coaching is valuable precisely because it makes room for a practical next action. We can acknowledge that the assignment is poorly defined while refusing to turn that fact into a judgment about our intelligence or competence. Not knowing something is a problem to investigate; it is not, by itself, a verdict on the person encountering it.
A practical method: turn the vague task into a solvable problem
Return to the onboarding assignment. Instead of promising to “work harder” for the rest of the morning, the developer can apply a sequence of small decisions. The method is useful far beyond software engineering: it also applies to writing a report, designing a course, preparing for an exam, or starting an unfamiliar personal project.
1. Define the obstacle more precisely
“This task is impossible” contains very little actionable information. “I do not know which onboarding step is causing users trouble, or how success will be measured” is much more useful. The second description identifies the missing knowledge and suggests where to look next.
2. Decide what can be clarified, and by whom
Write down the two or three questions whose answers would most change your approach. For example: “Which user behavior should improve?” and “Is there a constraint we must preserve?” Then ask the appropriate person, with enough context to make answering easy. Requesting information is not evidence of inadequacy. In ambiguous work, it can be the most competent action available.
3. Choose a small, reversible step
While waiting for a response, perhaps you can map the current user journey, inspect an existing test, or sketch two possible approaches and compare their trade-offs. Choose an action that creates information or useful work without prematurely committing the whole project to an unverified assumption. When an action carries meaningful risk, getting clarification first may itself be the correct next step.
4. Make the beginning observable
Replace “I will figure this out later” with “At 10:30, I will open the relevant document, list the unresolved requirements, and send one focused question.” Set a reasonable minimum commitment, such as twenty or thirty minutes, and remove one or two obvious distractions. The goal is to create genuine contact with the task rather than wait until it feels inviting.
5. Review what actually happened
After the work period, ask: What do I know now that I did not know earlier? Which uncertainty remains? What is the next meaningful step? Also notice the behavioral evidence: perhaps you began while reluctant, worked while unsure, and made a small amount of progress. That is more informative than repeatedly telling yourself that you ought to be disciplined.
What if the discomfort remains?
It may. The task may still be complicated, the response to your question may be incomplete, or your first approach may need revision. A realistic mindset never promises that useful work will feel good once you begin. Sometimes the appropriate response is to continue through manageable frustration; at other times it is to change the plan, ask for help, or rest because you are genuinely depleted. Flexibility means making that distinction based on the situation rather than obeying either a demand for comfort or a demand to push endlessly.
There is also a longer-term implication. Most meaningful goals are built through many ordinary work periods, not one exceptional burst of motivation. A weekly minimum of a few well-chosen sessions can be more useful than an ambitious daily promise that repeatedly collapses. Planning what matters, defining the next action, and returning after setbacks turn the ability to face discomfort into something we can practice.
A five-minute exercise for the task you are avoiding
Choose one task you have been postponing. On a sheet of paper, complete these four sentences: “The concrete result I want is…”; “The part I still do not understand is…”; “I would prefer better conditions, but I can tolerate…”; and “The first action I will take, at a specific time, is…”. If the next action is still vague, make it smaller or identify the question that needs to be answered first.
Notice the combination: you are adjusting an unhelpful belief while also improving your description of reality. Neither component replaces the other. More flexible thinking helps you remain engaged with the problem, and practical problem-solving gives that thinking a direction.
Go deeper with How to Do Hard Things: The Discomfort Trap
I developed this approach in greater depth in How to Do Hard Things: The Discomfort Trap, a practical self-coaching book that explores why we postpone important work, how rigid expectations about comfort and motivation contribute to avoidance, and how to build realistic systems for action. Across thirteen chapters, the book covers inertia, immediate gratification, impatience with slow progress, all-or-nothing thinking, rational responses to discomfort, concrete work protocols, weekly planning, and the problem-solving habits that make progress more likely.
The book is written by Constantin Liculescu, the formal author name I use for Costin Liculescu of InsightArea. Its aim is to help readers think more clearly about difficult work and take useful action without demanding perfect motivation or certainty first.
Explore How to Do Hard Things: The Discomfort Trap on Amazon →
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